IC CONTACT

[mirrortide]

✆CHANNEL FREQUENCY: 124.96350
DESCRIPTION: Lapis doesn't really like this radio. It makes her think there's someone inside of it every time it goes off.

✉MAIL BOX LOCATION: Mailbox on Door
DESCRIPTION: Mail will probably not be read. Or it will be read and not be responded to. Worst case scenario it's responded to and you cant read it because Gem writing is completely incomprehensible. You're better off just yelling at her in person for whatever she's done.

Comments

[mirrortide]

I know that! [She's lashing out a little bit, because it's frustrating. Steven's frustrating, for all the good he does. Doesn't he get that there's other people who might need his help? That it's stupid to throw himself into something that is 100% dangerous like this?]

I don't want him to get hurt! I don't want Connie to get hurt either! [She'd say Peridot too, but like, she doesn't know... that Peridot probably wants to go too.]

[periphrasing]

[Truthfully, Peridot doesn't want to go. She'd straight up rather not get involved, especially not after everything that happened with the manor. It's Steven and Connie's involvement alone that will wind up dragging her into this, and she's not going to like it.]

I know...

[She's having a hard time thinking of anything to say. She'd kind of hoped that taking a vacation back home would help Lapis feel refreshed and prepared to deal with the day-to-day dangers of carnival life, but it doesn't seem to have worked.

Pumpkin whines and marches over to Lapis, putting a stubby leg up on her ankle and whimpering sympathetically.]

[mirrortide]

[Lapis is, quite frankly, not having the best of times with the carnival. Everything happens so much and there's not nearly enough of a break between bad things happening for her tastes.

Granted, she'd prefer if bad things just stopped happening all together.

But now she has Steven to worry about getting involved too. And Connie. Which means Peridot will probably get involved too, and it's almost like there's a large fight brewing and there's nothing she can really do to protect anyone she cares about from getting involved.

Her thoughts are on a downward spiral until she hears Pumpkin whine, and she bends down, gently scooping the gourd up.]

I don't want any of you to get hurt.

[periphrasing]

[Peridot frowns sadly at the two of them for a long moment, watching as pumpkin snuggles up against Lapis in an attempt to comfort. After a moment, the green gem scoops Fleshy up in her own arms and stands up, squeezing the weird little creature anxiously.

The temptation to provide physical affection is a powerful one, but Peridot doesn't know how Lapis will react to it. Not positively, if she had to guess. She keeps her distance for now.]

I don't want anyone to get hurt either, [she agrees, curling her tail around her own ankle.] But if we can't stop everyone from going, the next most logical thing we can do is at least try to support them, right?

[mirrortide]

I'm not good at that, Peridot! I'm bad at protecting anyone, I couldn't even protect Steven from myself, and I couldn't protect you, and... I just can't. I'm not good at it.

[She's only good for hurting people. Jasper is right. She's a monster, no matter how she tries to hide it or change. Gems don't change. They can't.]

[periphrasing]

Hey, that's not true!

[Peridot looks kind of angry?]

Remember that day when we first became barnmates? You protected me from all of those rubies, literally with just a wave of your hand. That Roaming Eye would have blasted me and Steven both to sand if you hadn't stepped in!

[mirrortide]

Those were Rubies! They're not exactly hard to fight, even with a Roaming Eye!

[Like, any sufficiently capable Gem would have been able to take them down, in her opinion. It's just that she was there at the right place and the right time. Nothing more or less.]

[periphrasing]

Not hard for you, maybe! I wouldn't have stood a chance against them!

[HOLY SHIT JUST TAKE THE COMPLIMENT, LAPIS. Peridot clenches her eyes and rubs her gem, looking incredibly weary for a second.]

You're always selling yourself short like that. Why?

[mirrortide]

[no]

I'm not. I just don't think I'm as capable as you seem to think I am. [She's shaking her head.] Besides, the Rubies were looking for Jasper anyway. They wouldn't have blasted you at all.

[periphrasing]

Um, no.

[Just no.]

First of all, if there's one thing that I know-- which is just an expression for the record, because obviously I know far more than just one thing-- but if there's one thing that I know, it's weapons systems. Those blasters were charging to fire.

[mirrortide]

I'm sure you also know then that you could have easily moved out of the way. Or that Steven could have used his shield to block it. [She didn't do anything amazing, Peridot!]

[periphrasing]

[Peridot can't help but scowl a little.]

Lapis why are you always so determined to put yourself down!? You're an exceptional gem. I like you, STEVEN likes you. Obviously you're doing something right!

[mirrortide]

I'm not exceptional! I'm terrible! I've done horrible things, Peridot! I'll probably do horrible things again! [She... still wants to do terrible things, and she's not sure for how long she'll even be able to resist doing them.]

[periphrasing]

Just because you've done bad things in the past doesn't guarantee you'll do something bad again now. Satistically it may make it more likely, sure... but that's why you have us!

[mirrortide]

And what if you're gone! What happens when this place does something awful again and I don't have a choice! It's not like it hasn't happened to you! [Lapis very vividly remembers the whole vampire nonsense!]

[periphrasing]

[Yikes, okay Peridot is pretty well aware that she is losing this... argument? If you can call it that. She's losing Lapis, watching helplessly as the other gem gets swept up in her own anxiety.]

Alright I think we're getting a little bit too caught up in hypotheticals now. Let's just take a few breaths, and try to think this through, okay?

[mirrortide]

[Thankfully at least Lapis knows that Peridot is right. All of this is hypothetical. Even if it's an extremely probably hypothetical from her past experiences here!

Lapis clenches her hands tightly into fists.]

I.. Right. Sorry, Peridot.